Pumpkin Birth

I had no idea this was a thing. Well, it is.

So here are the many pumpkins that people have sent to me that are giving birth.

All I can think of when I look at them is, “Yep, that’s about right.”

 

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I’m impressed that this pumpkin had the foresight to prepared for her home birth with the plastic tarp. She must have a good midwife (probably an acorn squash).

 

I can’t tell if she’s screaming from labour or lack of leg

 

I love the booties.

 

This pumpkin is clearly drunk and didn’t even know that she was pregnant. pfft.

 

How can something so simple weird me out so much?

 

I’m a little concerned with the level of detail here.

 

You yell as much as you want, Honey. Those angry sparkler babies are damn painful.

 

I love the horrified pumpkin in the background. That’s right, Buddy, birth isn’t always pretty so smarten up before she kicks your ass with her butternut squash legs.

 

Surprise! Your baby is green. You’ve got some explaining to do.

 

i am emily

I’m a little impressed at the back story this picture creates.

 

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I wish someone would move that knife out of the shot and clean that poor pumpkin up. She doesn’t need that nonsense.

 

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This gourd really has it together. Candles, music, skinny legs and full control over her birth. Bravo!

 

I think this pumpkin needs more meds – delirium has clearly set it.

 

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Holy shit, how am I going to feed all these pumpkins!?

 

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That’s a pretty awesome rack that pumpkin is sporting. It sort of cancels out the mess she made on the table, non?

 

Marlowe Dunker

 

This was carved by an OB nurse for the hospital she works at and I think it’s totally kickass.

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There you have it. I hope you’re as disturbed as I am with the emotional accuracy that some of these pumpkins possess.  Happy Halloween!

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