Awkward Pregnancy Photos II

All these images get 6 hell yeahs and a shot of Jäger from me. Hope you enjoy them too.

It was this time last year that I did the Awkward Pregnancy Photos post and it was a real hit.

Since then, many people have sent me images that are just as awesome, if not better, than some of the first shots. (How that is even possible is beyond me). Plus, my buddies at Awkward Family Photos never fail to supply me with a bonanza of pregnancy glory. So may I present Awkward Pregnancy Photos Part Deux – Pregnancy Photos with a Vengeance!

All these images get 6 hell yeahs and a shot of Jäger from me. Hope you enjoy them too.


“Okay, I’ll do your ‘Hoop, der it is’ idea but just don’t show my face”


May I call you Kung Fu Panda? Why certainly, may I deliver a front snap-kick to your pills?



There’s a good chance that this baby is going to require sunscreen of SPF 50 and higher.



I can’t help but hear the Jaws theme when I see this photo.



Jerry felt pretty cocky about taking the last bag of Oreos a pregnant lady was reaching for at Wegman’s, until his dismembered body was later found in the forest just outside of town.



Shhh, he falls asleep like this all the time. Just give him a minute.



Proud and noble, Donna figured the tutu and legs she found at Build-A-Bear would cleverly disguise her growing belly.



It’s all fun and games until someone gets ingested by a tree.



Hearing only “topless and melons”, he was sorely disappointed when he showed up for the photoshoot.



“Hey, lady. Get away from my picnic! Fuck!”



“Okay, well be sure to take a shot that I can send to Aunt Cathy. Just because wouldn’t come to the wedding doesn’t mean she’s not excited about the baby.”



Tired and exhausted from noodling for catfish, Carol decided to take a rest on the riverbank while keeping an eye out for gators.



Oh snap, stolen mini-mime vest and pants!



Hush, hush sweet little man-baby. Everything’s going to be alright.



I agree that the question mark is vital on this man’s t-shirt. Where is he looking? Why did he feel the need to layer two black tees? Why isn’t he happy? How do they get their hostas in the background to grow so well?



Quickly wrapping the table cloth around her naked body and running outside, she still wasn’t fast enough to catch the ice-cream truck.



Cat’s is the second longest running musical of all time, therefore, this image is timeless! Stick that in your bum and lick it.



Seeing as I had trouble putting on my shoes during my pregnancy, I can’t help but be impressed by this modest little flower’s agility.



I hope this is hanging over the fireplace for when their sassy mouthed 13-year old daughter brings her friends over.


And finally, there was this picture that I decided to remove because a few people started frothing at the mouth and leaving all caps comments with no punctuation.

Thanks to all of you that sent me these shots and thank you Awkward Family Photos for coming out with yet another book I want for Christmas. Lastly, I hope all you folks in the shots had wonderful, healthy babies. Good on ya for going all out with your photoshoot – hey, you never know what’s going to work.

Nope, just doesn’t get old for me. It just doesn’t get old.

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  • All professional pregnancy pictures are awkward. I wish it would stop. Trust me, nobody wants to see them, most of all your poor children.

  • Eek, Spanish moss has chiggers living in it! I live where it grows in abundance, and tourists love to take pictures of it around their necks and whatnot. Then they are surprised when they start itching.

    I got attacked by chiggers in my backyard this past summer. I counted over 100 bites before I stopped counting, and it was miserable. I wasn’t even pregnant then. I can’t imagine how bad that would be if I were!

  • I think the ? on the dude's black T shirt refers to his androgyny. He may actually be a dudette, which explains the rack.

  • THANK YOU! These are so funny, I'm not sure it's safe for a pregnant lady to laugh that hard. I may need to change my pants…

  • In my old age I sometimes wonder if I did really miss something by not experiencing the "miracle of life." Ah, now I feel better, thanks. Just kidding! Blessings to you all on the toughest job of them all.

  • People to chillax about that last photo. I don't care how long her husband was gone or how much leave he got, the fact that she thought it was appropriate to great him in a room full of people while half naked and wearing body paint is HILARIOUS.

    Also, if any of you read instead of immediately getting your self-righteous panties in a twist, Amy said "I'm sure she conceived when he was on leave".

  • Ok people with zero sense of humor….. She obviously conceived while her husband was on leave. I think the funny part is her standing there in a gym full of family members and military members half naked with her belly painted. She should have saved that for the privacy of her own home. Keep the picture… She fails for her attire!!!

    P.S. I am a military member and am not offended. Every military member and family member that I know is not offended.

  • These are awesome and hilarious! The Circle of Life one is downright disturbing.

    I agree with others about that last one, though. It would be best to take it down. That poor girl has been made fun of enough. 🙁

  • Relax people, we all know the baby was conceived on leave. The picture is funny because of the cap ion and because she thought it was a good idea to wear such little clothing and paint her belly.

    These are all freaking funny. Thanks for making my day!!

  • Grow up everyone.

    The picture of the military wife is FUNNY! Anyone with a brain knows her husband came home for R&R and that's where the belly came from.

    Get a sense of humor. I think you'll find life is much more enjoyable with it.

  • They are hilarious, except for the military one and I hope it gets removed. She conceived while her husband was home on his 2 week R&R!!

  • I can see where you guys are coming from as far as the last picture, but at the same time, taken out of context it is kind of funny. I also say this coming from a military family. Seeing a very pregnant woman with a "gone for 12 months" under her picture is amusing. I was smart enough to go "Oh, he must have gotten leave." but the image is still kind of amusing.

  • Hahah great stuff!!

    The cats were probably the LEAST CREEPY of the bunch because at least they have an explanation for their actions!! Double black T-shirt guy.. Scary.. Old too. Way too old unless his bad look transcends him to another age category.

    Gatorbaby the best of the nature shots. Hidden danger lurking in that photo!

  • i love all of these except the last. the woman in that photo has been ridiculed for this. soldiers get a 2 week leave during thier deployment. that is when she got pregnant. her husband's leave was towards the beginning of the deployment…
    i was pregnant when my husband came home from war in aug 2010, but he had been home in april 2010, hence how i was pregnant at homecoming, same thing for that lady 🙂
    i wish i could find the article written by her

  • Your captions are effing hilarious…trying to read this while feeding my baby, kept waking her up by laughing my ass off!

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