How absolutely refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who spends much of the day having conversations with myself in my own head. This guest post from Kris takes it to a new level by outlining the crazy internal monologue of a pregnant woman. (By the way, YES, you are totally sleeping for two.)
When I was pregnant with my now 3-month-old little girl, my brain was constantly racing with questions and confusion about my body, my baby, and the future. Here’s just a little peek inside the spinning top that was my mind.
1. Is nipple reduction a thing? Because these bad boys are getting out of control.
2. Is there a Red Lobster around here? I have a fever and the only prescription is more cheddar biscuits!
3. I had to order myself three takeout entrees to meet the delivery minimum, right?
4. Do I have any ice cream in the fridge?
5. Would it be weird to order myself an entire pizza (for the second time this week)?
6. How many times have I peed today?
7. Have my coworkers noticed how many times I had to pee today?
8. Is $85 too much for a pair of baby shoes?
9. Does it even matter if baby shoes fit if they can’t walk?
10. Am I glowing or sweating?
11. Do I look pregnant yet or still just overweight?
12. Why aren’t all jeans maternity jeans? I should have started wearing these years ago!
13. Whoa, what is going on with my belly button? When did that happen?
14. Do my eyebrows really not need a wax this week or have I just lowered my standards?
15. Why am I so tired?
16. Where in my office is the best place to take a nap?
17. Is “sleeping for two” a thing?
18. Do I really need a pregnancy pillow or do I just need my husband to go sleep on the couch?
19. What happens if my water breaks at work? Who’s cleaning that up?
20. How much longer?
21. Seriously, how much longer?