My Favourite Santa Shots

This really has nothing to do with pregnancy except that someone gave birth to each and every one of these people, plus, these Santa shots are just too good not to share so what the heck.


“Why is Santa burnt like that? I don’t wanna to burst into flames! Get me off this crispy lap!”

I will keep these children until I get my boiled beef and mead!

I have no words for how much I love this Santa. It’s like he said, “Let’s embrace the elephant in the room, shall we? Hand me my shades and let’s do this.”

“Shut up, Mittens! I told you *I* was going to ask for tuna and the red dot on the wall”

Little Mikayla was quite content to sit on her green chair until Santa came up behind her and screamed, “There be gold in those hills! Arrrrhhhh.”

What in the Rasputin hell is going on here? Is 4270 the number of children that have needed therapy after their Christmas picture?

Even Santa himself was startled by the gas revenge his food court burrito was taking.

This kid was so way ahead of his time. And Glee.

I have no doubt that this little girl is chewing on a Xanax after her Percocet smoothie to get her up on this lap.

Why do I suspect that there is also a puddle of urine under this Santa’s chair?

“One time. Just one fucking time I’d like a holiday where the shit wasn’t scared out of me!”

Hey, at least he still has his hat. We’ve all been there, man. We’ve all been there.

“Jingle Bells! Jingle Bells! Jingle all the way!!!” Everybody!

Yep, this is showing up in a wedding slideshow.

May God bless you and your giant penis, Sir.


Merry Christmas, Peeps!

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