Bun in the literal oven (and other pregnancy/postpartum surprises)

When I read this post from Lisa Peek over at peekatparenting.com, I thought "yes!" I was so damn hot when I was pregnant – not 'sexy' hot more like 'fat man back hair' hot. Are we alone in this?By the way, I added a link to hair tourniquets but don't look it up. It's when one of your hairs gets wrapped around a baby's toe. It happens all the time but you see it and you take it off. They only publish the horror stories so don't look.- Amy

 

 

So when you’re pregnant, a common phrase is that you have a bun in the oven. What no one tells you is that you literally become an oven. I have never been more hot in my life than the last 3 years as I’ve been pregnant or nursing/post partum for all but a month or so of the last 3 years.

My wardrobe (read more about my awesome sexy mom wardrobe here) these last 3 years is exclusively tank tops. I might as well pack the rest of my clothes away and I don’t know why I haven’t. I’m sure my husband would appreciate the closet space it would free up. I very rarely put on anything else, especially when nursing but mostly just because I’m so hot and the thought of putting any more cotton on my skin besides that makes me wanna do the polar plunge.

Almost 9 years ago I moved from Michigan to south Texas which I loved. The weather here was perfect to me. Hot but not humid. Now, even 80 degrees here makes me sweat like a whore in church. I cannot get cool enough most of the time. I nearly bought one of those personal misting fans this last pregnancy.

And being hot, especially post partum/nursing hot, makes me so irrationally frustrated and stabby. I get so pissed off that I feel like I become the hulk and I could hulk smash something. My poor husband I get so crazily angry when I’m hot I’ve lashed out and said some things to him that afterward I’m like wtf did I say that for? And I feel terrible. Thank god for him, he tolerates it and doesn’t get his feelings hurt easily.

I’m so hot even in my house with tank top and shorts on, air conditioning and fans on. My poor kids I got from my mom the inclination to dress my kids how I feel, so they’re probably cold all the time because I’m sweating so I put them in minimal clothing as well.

My insane hotness, and not the appearance kind, is part of the reason I chopped off my long hair last summer, couldn’t stand the pony tail down my back. Now that I’m starting to get a ponytail again you’ll frequently find it clipped up.

I was so surprised at just how hot I get and how it makes me feel. I definitely don’t remember anyone telling me about that.

I also didn’t know that I would lose so much hair, which is tricky because with a baby you have to keep an eye out for hair tourniquets. It’s so easy to see how they can get them now, when you lose a handful of hair a day! I’m so annoyed with having to clean up my hair everywhere. And it is EVERYWHERE.

I also had no idea that breastfeeding could make you NOT LOSE WEIGHT! Everyone says the pounds will fly off because you’re breastfeeding. I’m here to tell ya folks… Not necessarily true!! With both boys now, my weight does not fluctuate more than a pound in either direction. No matter what I eat and what exercise I do. So … Might as well enjoy myself and keep my maternity clothes out!

What are some of the things that no one told you about pregnancy/postpartum?

 

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Bun in the literal oven (and other pregnancy/postpartum surprises)

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48 Comments

  • Lol this whole journey has been a lot of WTF?? Like nosebleeds-my nose spontaneously combusts at the most random moments. And I’ve heard about food cravings but not really the opposite. I hate chicken now with a fierce, must exile it passion. Leg and abs cramps were weird too-I would wake up feeling like I’d been doing crunches and sprints all night. Oh and the magical first trimester burping-I burped for weeks without drinking anything carbonated O.o seriously weird stuff so far lol

  • Nothing annoyed me more than the whole lack of weight loss from nursing!!!!! So many people end up thinner than pre-pregnancy due to nursing but not me!! And unfortunately it took me a while to realize that, so I ate all the time. Oops.

  • You mean this heat might not go away after I give birth?! Damnation! I’ve never been a "hot" person in my life. I have my heater on at work in the summer, I bring sweaters with me everywhere in August because if the sun go behind a cloud, I’m instantly hypothermic, I shiver when I eat ice cream. Not this year though, 8 months pregnant with my first, and even though I bring that sweater everywhere still, I’m carrying it because I’m hot ALL THE TIME and sweat seems to come out of places I didn’t even know could sweat…I swear if I lifted my boobs off my belly a waterfall would cascade out. Was sort of hoping that would go away once the little heater in my abdomen decides to make an appearance… but looks like I’m going to be investing in A/C units this summer :P.

  • What did nobody tell me? How about the one where you wake up in the morning and it looks like your pillow just hit puberty?

    And because you so. very. tired it takes you several minutes to work out that it’s actually your hair that’s falling out in actual fucking handfuls. Which is just not fair because it didn’t look THAT full and luscious when you were pregnant. I mean, it’s not like people were high fiving you on the fro or anything and yet now you have to stand by and hope that nobody thinks you have mange and that the hair will just STOP falling out before you need to buy a wig.

    Just me?

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